Hamilton Is Dead To Me Now

So these dumb fucks in Hamilton have some fucking nerve, is all I can say. Sure, if I get a hockey team I am only going to use their crappy arena for three years until I get a real arena in Kitchener-Waterloo. And sure I expect them to spend 200 million of their taxpayers' money on that ugly arena to make it fit for me to set foot in for those three years. And sure I expected them to tear the name of their beloved Victor Copps (anyone ever heard of this guy? I sure haven't) off of the marquee and replace it with mine. But does that give them the right to screw me over?

Of course not. I'm Jim fucking Balsillie! But they did ... those selfish miserable low-class FUCKS from Hamilton did.

Here is the deal: I told the mayor that he had to cancel the lease of the Hamilton Bulldogs - the team that was in MY arena - this summer, before the AHL schedule came out. He said "But Sir, you don't have a team yet" and I said to him "Listen, you filthy piece of garbage, I am fucking Captain Canada and you do what I say, it doesn't matter if I have one team or no team or five teams. If i say 'shit in your hat, Fred' you had better fucking well run out and buy a nice hat and take a fucking dump in it! If I say 'kill your kids and grind them up for sausage' I want to see you out running the fucking hot dog cart on the street that fucking afternoon! You understand, you pathetic little shit?"

Now, to be honest, I don't remember his answer to that because my intern du jour chose that moment to drop her Blackberry and then bend over and pick it up and I got a really good cleavage shot - god damn but I do love those college-girl tits - and I was distracted. But it shouldn't matter what he said, the dumb fuck should have just done it.

Now I find out that the AHL schedule is out and the Bulldogs have their dates booked with the stupid ugly arena and now I have to pretend that I am willing to work with them and co-operate and shit. Co-operate! Me! I'm Jim Balsillie - I dont fucking "co-operate" with anyone. People fucking well do what I say! Co-operating is for poor people. You know, like in Hamilton.

Un-fucking-believable. You filthy Hamilton fucks are really going to pay for this one.